Query adjectives/adverbs be gone!

Agents, overwhelmed with the volume of queries received, look for any excuse to glance and dump! If your query is crammed with descriptive words—adjectives and adverbs—it will be rejected immediately. Why? Because a query filled with weak words that explain or modifiy, waves a big red flag concerning the manuscript. It's probably written in the same manner. Logical thought, donchathink?

Here’s a technique to help you ID those pesky adverbs and adjectives. Print your query letter. Use a yellow highlighter to mark adjectives, a pink one for adverbs. Does your page look like it's been kissed by a rainbow? If so, get rid of the highlighted words by replacing them and revising your sentences using powerful nouns and verbs that don't need to be explained.

Time spent in this adjective and adverb “search and destroy” mission is time well spent. It can help your query leap out and above all the rest.

Query Re-writes and Re-writes

I’ve re-written my query dozens of times and it's

becoming worse and more muddled. Everybody

who reads it says "do" something else.

Help! I’m stuck on the query go ‘round.

Sharing your query with everybody you know and asking for their opinions (which they happily share) is like being pecked to death by ducklings (my new favorite expression). Changing this and that endlessly, without good cause, creates goulash instead of a well-crafted query that works.

Consider the source. Are your advisers writers? Published authors? Experienced editors? Grandma? The butcher, baker, or candlestick maker? Members of your writers’ group? What is their knowledge base? How much do they understand about the purpose of the query? However, before discounting them, pay attention to any comments that are similar. The other suggestions? Leave them by the wayside and re-vise your way back to telling the most important aspects of your story as it revolves around your protagonist.

At some point, stop. Set it aside. Go bowling or begin another project. After a week or so, revisit your query. You’ll discover aspects that you know have value, and others that don’t. Look at the positive aspects of your query confusion. This is forcing you to focus on your story as you condense it down into two paragraphs. Forces you to think about your story as you condense it down ito two paragraphs, approximately 200 words. These 200 words need to tell who the story is about, what do they want, what stands in their way and why, and what is the terrible possibility, the “or else” factor. This forms the basis for your query. If these elements are not in your story, whoopsie! That’s where you need to begin.

Query letter RED FLAG words

The query letter enables you to prove you are a writer of skill. Not just any writer, but one who knows what they’re doing. Overwhelmed with query submissions, agents will give your query a nano-second of attention. They’re looking for a reason to reject so they can read as many queries as possible (and reduce the overwhelming size of the slush pile).

You want them to read your first, second and third paragraphs. Not to stop when they see a red flag, and then another, and another. The most common red flag? Weak words that send the message, Amateur! Amateur!

What are some of the most overused "weakies?" Is, are, was, were, being, be, did, that, got, feel, think, take, and that are the ones I spot most while helping clients tighten their query letters. My advice? Re-vise sentences that contain them. This is time well spent. Agents will make the assumption that weak words in a query signal weak words in your manuscript. Kaboom! Off your query flies to the reject pile.

Avoid this dreaded query letter fate by revising and getting rid of the weakies. Do the same with your manuscript. Do everything you can to insure your submission is as polished and professional as possible.

Avoid becoming a query pest

How long should I wait to contact the agent

to be sure they’ve received my query letter?

How about forever?

Email query letters usually receive a response within a few weeks, or less, or never. Some agents send back either a "sure, send me your manuscript" or use a generic and polite email rejection, “Thanks but not quite right for our list”--something to that effect. Others do not respond at all, ever.

You'll hear back for a snail mail query, sent with an SASE, within six weeks to three months, or longer, or never. If the agent is interested in your manuscript, they'll call or send an email. Otherwise, they'll send the "Thanks, but no thanks" form rejection letter.

Pestering the agent about reading your query or your submitted material results in their applying bug spray (i.e., tossing your query) to eliminate you, the pest, from their life.

If you’re antsy, do something else instead of stalking the mailperson. Take up kayaking, go to the gym, plant trees, paint the bathroom, or . . . begin a new writing project.

Three query mistrakes to avoid

ONE: Never, ever, ever, ever use colored type, either on your letter or your email. This waves the red flag and shouts, DANGER! DANGER! RUN AWAY! AMATEUR! The result most likely will be instant rejection.

TWO: Always use a font that can be read. At the moment, 2009 AD, the font of choice is Times Roman, 12 point. Unless an agent begs you to use Courier, don't do it. This Blah-asaurus type face dates back to the Jurassic Age. Do not use Ariel. Too difficult to read quickly since it lacks a serif (the little foot at the bottom of each letter stem). Don’t even think about using an ant-print-sized font to enable you to squeeze more words onto a page. If the agent opening your query has to hunt around for a magnifying glass. . . guess what? They won’t!

THREE: Avoid indents or fancy bullets. Three standard paragraphs, not four, not five, not one long one. Three paragraphs. Once space between each paragraph. Follow the format suggested in my FREE 31-page mini-query workbook. Click on the Query Club link to the right, sign up for the newsletter and voila! you'll receive the workbook PDF download link.

Remember KISS (keep it simple, stupid!) so you’ll look like a pro and increase the chances your entire query will be read and the agent will ask for a manuscript submission.

Do agents really read queries?

Yes, eventually, especially the queries which capture their interest, make them curious to know more about the manuscript and/or the writer. Be aware, agents do much more than sit around coffee shops and read queries. They deal with publishers, negotiate contracts, attend meetings, email and phone editors and publishers, return phone calls and emails, distribute royalty checks, and so on. . . all activities which sustain their business. Agents work long hours assisting their clients, selling manuscripts to publishers, and looking for new clients and projects to present. Reading queries is part of their business of doing business.

However, many agents have interns or acquisition people who act as first screeners—Guardians of the Gate. These folks usually can be found near, behind (or under) a slush pile of unsolicited material. As they go through the letters, they make the decision to return, discard, or forward to the boss. So, even if your query isn’t read by the agent you’ve directed it to, it does get read by someone working for the agent. Hopefully, you’ve written it effectively, and it flies right through the first reader’s hands and onto the pile of to-be-read material sitting on the desk, floor, or shelf in the agent’s office.

Email queries follow the same path even though they first appear on the screen of an intern, acquisitions person, or agent. The reader scans the screen, which is 14 to 16 lines of text, makes the decision to read further, request to see more, delete the query and move on to the next, or (and this frequently happens), or send a standard email response, “Thank you very much for thinking of us, but . . .